I Lie To Myself

Photo by: Madamchryzl

I tell myself, if you only knew….

What I was going through…

That there is so much that you would do…

Perhaps you would hold me and tell me that this was meant to be…

Maybe if you would look into my eyes and see, what this has done to me…

I tell myself, that somewhere out there you really do still care…

I lie to myself, because speaking the truth is something that you do not dare…

Madamchryzl

Jester Of Hearts

My Heart is quite a fool… She is a continuous embarrassment of mine…

Although, she is quite punctual and hurts me all the time…

For over three decades she has deceived and mislead…

And a

All that I hear are hurtful laughs from my head…

“HA!

As if!”

“HA!

Get a grip!”

No need of convincing, I am a fool from tip to tip…

A toy amongst the tongues of silver and gold…

Never have I imagined hearts of ice could be this cold….

My heart hates me and I do not possess a single doubt…

Still, she remains a part of me that I just can not live with out…

Unwillingly, a Jester is what I shall remain…… She chose to stay with you; she is something only you contain. -Madamchryzl-

Lines of Sight 2.0

I can set my sights as far as I can see and know that you are still waiting with me.

My faults could be sprawled across the skies and erasing them would not be worth the tries.

Loving me comes with so much anguish and battle stands… Yet you rest in comfort within these pain inflicting hands…

Pains seems to come with my affections. I just plea to you; I’m sorry, please continue to battle with my rejections.

For my sights are set as far as I can see; and in the horizon, the morning sun is setting for you and me.

I suppose I might be in there somewhere…

Perhaps insignificant as some sort of random wild hair?

MAYBE just a thought, would you dare?

Probably not… because you are standing RIGHT THERE…

Am I truly, just so lovely and rare?

It is now obvious, I know… You no longer care…

You can stumble and stare…

ADVISORY, beware…

But I was so warm, O such a flare?

O troubling? Am I… The Snare?

“O, My Love!” I did declare…

“O what a couple? O what a pair?”

O WHAT! A LOVE WE HAD TO SHARE!

Your cost is deafening, quite unfair… Madamchryzl…

XoXo..

Candle With Out A Flame

My Love, would you please light a candle for me?

Ignite a flame so that I might see…

I stumble in the dark and close my eyes in the light…

My hands hurt from holding on too tight…

There is no sense to be made…

Only tears to cascade…

A new season has risen since you fled…

Void of any sweet words to be read…

Your eyes only know what you have to see…

But I am blind, please light a candle for me…

*Madamchryzl*

Day 33

Amore Mio

Amore Mio – A tribute to Leon & Mathilda “The Professional”

His presence was like static to her finger tips… Instantly, his shoulders had always belonged to her lips…

He made her pant and the air hard to breathe… All that he took; surely, he was a thief…

Uncommon and a sight, their differences were… The skeptics were a bore, or rather a blur…

Time and numbers were never very kind… He knew one day he would always leave her behind…

They filled a golden treasure box full of hours and days… As time moved on with out him; all that she was left was a tearful haze…

She sobbed and she wept; O her man of time… She mourned and faded over his ghost, over time…

Every morning and every night she prayed that she would hear; “I love you” once more… Till then; their locked treasure box was all that was left to adore… Madamchryzl… 

Snow Globe

Somewhere in this life’s infinite space, we can love..

There once was time, when our existence was beautiful enough to be captured within a glass bubble blown to circumference… Suspended in liquid with glitter and snow…

Overlooking the rest of the world on fire, we could hold each other safely. *Madamchrzyl*

Shakespeare wrote of baited breath as if he knew my love would be my death…

No glee or smile is true since you have left…

Not a tear has been spared. Not a word of honesty has been shared…I’m so uncertain and so very scared…

I mourn you day in and day out…

I am the only company Misery and Darkness will allow…

Broken and Sharp are my pieces; all scattered…

A ghostly mirror gravely fragmented; all shattered…

O Shakespeare, your tales of love and tragedy seems to by only life’s strategy…

The Moon, Himself

I’ve never known this sort of pain… I only want rain…

I long for dark clouds and roaring thunder…

I imagine the earth will swallow me up and take me under…

My heart beats with haste and all time seems to be such a waste…

It has 380 hours since I breathed…

O only if there was anything else that I would want or need…

If it were diamonds, I’d obtain that luxury.

If it were train, I would hop on quite urgently.

If it were the stars, that would be simpler to obtain…

But not even The Moon Himself can prevent; how relief continues to escape my pain…

As the clouds slowly dissipate into the earth…

I find myself contemplating worth…

What’s the worth of a penny after a toss?

What’s the worth of searching when we are the lost?

The penny, to be thrown about and to never be found again…

Us, to be amoungst the wandering and to never truly be grounded…

The heavy abyss, sounds like comfort as we rest in its shroud…

Much like us, we are thrown about yet desperate to conceal the most our hearts will allow…. MDM C

Cavalier Tears

I’ll be a good girl and do as I’m told…

Because only you and I know, what would happen if I were to fold…

All of my feelings that are tucked nearly and deep inside…

O what is a world like with nothing left to hide…

I’ll keep you stowed away… far…. in the one place that no one else is allowed play…

Though we are worlds apart…

You will always occupy my whole heart. ..

Some may see my eyes water, and assume it is sadness or fear… Little do they know me, I’m cavalier.

After this much loss; fright, no longer comes easy… He or no one will can ever remember me. MDM C

Yours

My sweetest of kisses would stick your lips…

They would softly remain, never parting, as time ticks.

My hugs would always surround you, to help and to cradle…

My love would be more grandiose than a Cinderella fable.

My hands and my fingertips would touch all that it’s allowed…

But it’s my heart, that is always the most wild….

It beats to a rhythm that is and quite untamed…

It purrs like tiny kitten, roars like a feral beast, and it is always on display laying at your feet… My Unnamed…

I knew you were in a midst…

All tucked away perfectly hidden amongst the mundane mist…

In a world of shiney and new…

You remained hidden more precious than gold times two…

More lovely and rare than best diamonds of a red hue…

Invisible to the common man…

But in a world that matters… You take the tallest stand.

You flew and sailed… You knew yet failed… You had a clue yet yelled…

You loved yet wailed…

I knew a hurt was coming…

I knew it would still be worth loving…

I knew the hurt was coming…

But I knew My Love was worth loving…

How you hold such mystery…

I swear you always seemed to miss me.. before you even first seen thee…

One day I’ll be free… and it will be you and me…

I miss the fog of my old Smokies…

I will never get back the person that I once was…

I know now that I am someone that you never really loved…

In your world I can see that I never really did exist…

I wasn’t even a shadow of any real bliss…

I weep and I cry…

And I just pray for painful beats of my heart to die…

My world without you; not a singular bird can fly…

Even the, once beautiful, eagles cry…

In your absence, even their majesty is a lie…

Your words linger like heavy lead…

Consistently replaying sweet words in my head…

Gullible was I, to believe the what I was fed…

“I want this forever…” you said with a stutter…

“I love you…” you said with a winded flutter…

My ears and my heart can not erase them…

Nor can your lips un-say them…

Only God can set me free now that you pretend to no longer know me…

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